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Pointers on How to Prepare for Marriage

There are several things you can do right now in preparation for your future life in marriage. With or without a serious relationship, it matters not. The earlier you start working on yourself, the better.

Here are five steps to get you started:

Review your habits.

Do you have habits can become a cause of conflict with your soon-to-be spouse? For instance, do you have poor time management skills, or do you typically leave your dirty laundry lying around? If you think you could use others’ opinions, don’t hesitate to ask your closest family members and friends. But let them be candid enough and don’t make them feel guilty. Improve your conflict resolution approach. Your single years are the best time to define your conflict resolution style and how you can improve it. Try to recall the last two or three conflicts you’ve had to deal with. How did you respond to them? Do you think you could have done anything differently?

Be more forgiving of yourself.

Everybody has imperfections, including you, so learn to take yourself less seriously. Begin with those tiny little frustrations, like forgetting where you put your car keys or mispronouncing certain words over and over. Instead of being angry, try to find humor in the situation and move on. Embracing yourself for your all that you are can be so liberating.

Seek ways to serve.

The best marriages are those where spouses are happy to sacrifice for each other and forget their own needs for the other. In your single years, you can cultivate a sense of servanthood. Find opportunities that let you be of service to your church and community. This could mean volunteering to babysit for single mom, driving an elderly neighbor to a friend’s house, or participating in your church’s outreach programs. With servanthood being an everyday part of your life now, you will be prepared for it in marriage later on.

Take stock of your friends.

Finally, know that it’s important to have a support system that encourages you to become a good spouse later on. With a simple friendship inventory, you will know if you have such people in your life. You can start by answering a few questions. One, do they think that marriage should be valued? Two, are they respect their opposite gender? Three, are they honest enough to tell you my flaws? They may not see themselves from this perspective. If you ask them to encourage you in specific areas of your life, they may be happy to oblige. Keep in mind that it’s not a mistake to choose your friends. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to surround yourself with people who will help you become a better person.

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